Racism is real and present in our society. Recognizing and understanding it, however, is not always easy or simple. Before you educate your children about anti-racism, ask yourself… “Where am I on my anti-racism journey?”
Am I aware of my unconscious biases, stereotypes and prejudices towards individuals who do not look or think like me? How diverse is my network of friends? Do I feel comfortable talking about racism? Am I able to challenge my family, friends, and colleagues when they make racist statements?
Becoming anti-racist is a continual learning process. It can create discomfort, but people (including children) have died because of racism, racist policies, and racist institutions. We agree with the excellent information our colleagues Dr. Whitney Raglin-Bignall, Dr. Ariana Hoet, and Dr. Jacquelyn Doxie King provided in “How to Talk to Your Kids About Racism.” We know our children begin recognizing differences in race and treatment of people based on race at an early age:
Children begin to understand racial stereotypes around ages 2-5 years Racial prejudice can develop in the early school-age period (ages 5-8 years) An ideal time to speak with children about prejudice is the school-age period (ages 9-12 years)
We can start by teaching children two key concepts that build the foundation for anti-racism:
“The Golden Rule”: Treat others the way you want to be treated Fairness: Actions and consequences that are right and honorable; illustrates the difference between EQUAL and EQUITABLE
Making sure our children learn respect, fairness, and kindness for everyone, regardless of their appearance, ability or background, helps them become anti-racist. Infants and Toddlers Children notice differences in physical features like skin color first, so it is very important to expose them to diverse groups of people as much as possible. Daycares, activity classes, playdates, and books can help introduce them to people from different cultures. It can also enhance their social-emotional development. Preschoolers Your children may ask questions about differences they observe. As you talk to them, positively celebrate diversity and differences in people. The American Psychological Association provides resources to help with these conversations and find age-appropriate content for children. Additionally, ask for and ensure exposure to books with diverse characters and concepts. In selecting these books, support authors that share authentic backgrounds with their characters and concepts. School-aged Children Continue using books that highlight diversity, equity, inclusion, and also address racism and discrimination. Identify TV programs, social media sites and other programs your children enjoy. What types of experiences and examples do they provide in helping children navigate fairness and honor “The Golden Rule?” Support programming that builds their cultural knowledge. Adolescents Begin incorporating news from various media platforms to begin discussions about the nuances of issues related to racism and xenophobia. It may feel uncomfortable, particularly with the wide range of opinions offered through media and news platforms. However, it is critical to help adolescents differentiate credible facts from misinformation. They can also learn to “agree to disagree” in a respectful and fair manner. Offer guidance and support as they navigate their understanding of these concepts at a deeper level with their peers and in their classes. Teaching anti-racism is an active part of parenting and supporting your child’s development. Never forget that all children and adolescents observe how you behave and interact, even when you are not directly talking to or teaching or parenting them. They learn how to respond and understand different situations that relate to race and racism by watching us. You must model that commitment to continual learning about active anti-racist practice too. Other Resources
Beyond the Golden Rule: A Parent’s Guide to Preventing and Responding to Prejudice - by Dana Williams Fostering Fairness in our Kids - The Family Dinner Project - The Family Dinner Project 80 Amazing Diverse Books to Read with Your Toddler - The Toddler Playbook Anti-Racism Resources (apadivisions.org) Children’s Books on Race and Equity - Trying Together
Racism is real and present in our society. Recognizing and understanding it, however, is not always easy or simple. Before you educate your children about anti-racism, ask yourself…
“Where am I on my anti-racism journey?”
- Am I aware of my unconscious biases, stereotypes and prejudices towards individuals who do not look or think like me?
- How diverse is my network of friends?
- Do I feel comfortable talking about racism?
- Am I able to challenge my family, friends, and colleagues when they make racist statements?
Becoming anti-racist is a continual learning process. It can create discomfort, but people (including children) have died because of racism, racist policies, and racist institutions. We agree with the excellent information our colleagues Dr. Whitney Raglin-Bignall, Dr. Ariana Hoet, and Dr. Jacquelyn Doxie King provided in “How to Talk to Your Kids About Racism.” We know our children begin recognizing differences in race and treatment of people based on race at an early age:
- Children begin to understand racial stereotypes around ages 2-5 years
- Racial prejudice can develop in the early school-age period (ages 5-8 years)
- An ideal time to speak with children about prejudice is the school-age period (ages 9-12 years)
We can start by teaching children two key concepts that build the foundation for anti-racism:
- “The Golden Rule”: Treat others the way you want to be treated
- Fairness: Actions and consequences that are right and honorable; illustrates the difference between EQUAL and EQUITABLE
Making sure our children learn respect, fairness, and kindness for everyone, regardless of their appearance, ability or background, helps them become anti-racist.
Infants and Toddlers
Children notice differences in physical features like skin color first, so it is very important to expose them to diverse groups of people as much as possible. Daycares, activity classes, playdates, and books can help introduce them to people from different cultures. It can also enhance their social-emotional development.
Preschoolers
Your children may ask questions about differences they observe. As you talk to them, positively celebrate diversity and differences in people. The American Psychological Association provides resources to help with these conversations and find age-appropriate content for children. Additionally, ask for and ensure exposure to books with diverse characters and concepts. In selecting these books, support authors that share authentic backgrounds with their characters and concepts.
School-aged Children
Continue using books that highlight diversity, equity, inclusion, and also address racism and discrimination. Identify TV programs, social media sites and other programs your children enjoy. What types of experiences and examples do they provide in helping children navigate fairness and honor “The Golden Rule?” Support programming that builds their cultural knowledge.
Adolescents
Begin incorporating news from various media platforms to begin discussions about the nuances of issues related to racism and xenophobia. It may feel uncomfortable, particularly with the wide range of opinions offered through media and news platforms. However, it is critical to help adolescents differentiate credible facts from misinformation. They can also learn to “agree to disagree” in a respectful and fair manner. Offer guidance and support as they navigate their understanding of these concepts at a deeper level with their peers and in their classes.
Teaching anti-racism is an active part of parenting and supporting your child’s development. Never forget that all children and adolescents observe how you behave and interact, even when you are not directly talking to or teaching or parenting them. They learn how to respond and understand different situations that relate to race and racism by watching us. You must model that commitment to continual learning about active anti-racist practice too.
Other Resources
- Beyond the Golden Rule: A Parent’s Guide to Preventing and Responding to Prejudice - by Dana Williams
- Fostering Fairness in our Kids - The Family Dinner Project - The Family Dinner Project
- 80 Amazing Diverse Books to Read with Your Toddler - The Toddler Playbook
- Anti-Racism Resources (apadivisions.org)
- Children’s Books on Race and Equity - Trying Together
